Expressing love in relationships

So today I ask myself to look at all of my interpersonal relationships. I am blessed with many people in my life in which I love in as many different ways. SO why is it I can tel my friends how much I love them, yet have a problem when it comes to expressing that to my "lovers"? I get all choked up when I have the burning urge to say the same.

Is it fear of rejection? No i really don't think that's it. Is it fear of the words not being returned? NO I don't think that's it either. My feelings are my own, if someone hasn't had enough time to know whether they love me or not, or if the word has a different meaning to them, it still doesn't effect my emotions in anyway. I have been looking in side myself to solve this riddle.

I really think what it is all about is sex. Dumb as that may seem. It seems like the people I have sex with, are the ones I fear saying the words to the most. But currently the people I have sex with are the ones that are closest in my life. I do love them all. SO what's up? A while back I had a wonderful night with one of my partners and I just wanted to tell him how much I love him, yet my heart was racing and I couldn't do it. But inside I was glowing, with love and passion, adoration and respect for him.

I think my fear stems in the fact that so many people equate sex with love. I have purposefully concentrated in my entire life to not have the attitude that good sex = Love, because in many cases it doesn't. Especially when you have sex with a new partner in the beginning of your relationship. So here lies my issue. I know I would love the people in my life whether I was having sex with them or not. Don't get me wrong the sex is powerful and amazing. Nonetheless I would still love them. Yet there is that over looming feeling that if I express that love it may seem to reflect in a different light due to the sex.

So pretty much I talk myself in circles. How could a word and such a good feeling cause so much anxiety? I am not sure I have had this problem as badly before. But I know I have had it in the past. One word just doesn't seem to cover the intensity of my friendship, trust, respect, and desire to always have a person in my life. I feel it falls short and is too easily misinterpreted.

I know I love many, that's what is so wonderful about my life and the people in it. We all have the capacity to really love and respect the others in our life in such amazing ways, and it seems the more we express it the more we all learn and grow from each other. So why not just look into someones eyes when you are overjoyed with their presence and say " wow you're amazing, I love having you in my life, thank you for being with me, I love you." ? Doesn't seem that hard, but for this closet sensualist it really can be.